Sunday, April 24, 2011

Epic and Ridiculous Things

I had a great conversation with a colleague tonight about what bands exist on people's radar, but never actually as anyones favourite. You know like Tonic and Len and stuff. Anyways I started thinking about movies that couldnt possibly exist in any reasonable person's TOP 10 and the first movie that sprung to mind was The Duplex starring Ben Stiller and Drew Barrymore. A simple facebook search uncovered a group called "Duplex is the greatest movie ever". So apparently a whopping 19 people (out of 500 million) are complete morons. And probably all friends.

For my own entertainment I've made a list of 3 films I would also categorize as awful and am going to categorize their online followings. I have no qualms or illusions about the fact that this is totally irrelevant, but as Fran Lebowitz has taught me, self-esteem has been taken far too seriously and everyone on the planet thinks the world is just dying to know their take on things. (At the very least we could call this research based) (Right?)

1. Ghosts of Mars - Despite Pam Grier, this movie has an IMDB rating of 4.8. That's actually not terrible overall. I'd estimate its pretty average for a bad movie, and really the only way you can really get under 2 or 3 is to feature Paris Hilton on the cover. 2,408 people "like" this movie on facebook. That seems about right, I mean between Ice Cube, Clea Duvall, and Carpenter you've basically covered enough demographics to acquire 2400 or so fans.

2. Gigli- I dont think any individual component of this film is laughable, but there's just something about the combination of Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck and low-ranking mobsters that just didnt spell "legit". Gigli boasts 4,964 facebook fans, just slightly shy of beating out onion rings at 5,044.

3. Baby Geniuses - I would actually retract this from the list based solely on the fact that the little boy on the cover looks EXACTLY like my brother Max and that's just too damn adorable. We'll let the IMDB 2.2 rating (that's bottom 100- sans an Hilton affiliations) speak for itself.

I was going to do 10 and then 5 and I'm going to wrap it up at 3. I spend way more time thinking about movies I like than movies I dont.

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